Break and Enter.

Today was an interesting day. It started-out quite normal with coffee and some good music. I did the dishes, made muffins and some chicken cacciatore and my friend Jen came over for a little visit. I realized that James and I had a movie that was due back by 12:00pm (Book Of Eli, amazing…you should see it) and since I really didn’t want to have to pay late charges the kids, Jen and I caught a bus to take us down Henderson and return said movie.

When I leave the front of our house and walk down the sidewalk I usually lock the back door by just closing the door and turning the little lock on the handle and then lock the front door behind me…which is just what I did. The problem with this system comes when we’ve gotten home from our movie store/starbucks adventure, lock the front door behind us and decide to spend some time enjoying the temporary sunshine in the backyard closing the back door behind us. I shouldn’t really say US because it was just ME that locked the front door and then closed the back door behind me. But it happened none-the-less and we found ourselves locked out of the house. Normally we have two windows that have remain unlocked, and have been since we bought the house, so I just figured that we could do what we had done in the past, slide open a window and hoist a small child through it and onto the dirty dishes in the sink and then they’ll run around and open the door (providing they cooperate). No such luck. Apparently James went through the house last week and locked all of the windows so that we wouldn’t have anyone come by, slide the window open and hoist THEIR small child through and take our things. So I slipped the bobby pins out of my hair, bent them a bit and went to town trying to pick the lock. Then Jen went to town trying to pick the lock. Then hands were laid on the door and prayers were prayed and then each of us took turns hoping that the Good Lord would take pity on our situation. No such luck. We were really locked out of the house. Rhys kept reminding me that I should have brought the keys outside. Ya, I know…I realize my mistake now son. I happened to make the comment to Jen that at least Amelia had already taken a dump a little earlier considering I didn’t have an extra diaper with me. Spoke to soon. Ammie was changing into her bathing suit, which is one of the few things I had grabbed, and as she slipped her diaper off (I know, I know, it’s time for her to be potty trained) she casually pointed out that she had pooped herself. Great. I grabbed her hand just as it was reaching around and grabbed her diaper before it touched anything and hauled her off to the corner of the yard. I grabbed the hose and pressure washed the poop off of her bum. Yup, I did. She thought it was pretty funny and I only thought that it was funny afterward. So we sat outside for a while talking and swatting mosquitoes and wondering if we could wait until 5:30 when James would get home. Silly Bria. Then it dawned on me that we have basement windows that are fairly sketchy looking and maybe we should try that mode of entry. We walked to one, no such luck. We walked around the house to the other one and slid the window panes back effortlessly. Bingo. Now to get in. These windows are very small, my child is very small. Send the child! Rhys was willingly pushed through the little opening and was practically dangling and almost in when he started to freak-out. C’MON SON! You’ve done a Break and Enter before! No such luck. We hauled him out and I decided to take my chances. I flipped onto my stomach and wiggled in feet first. Feet in…good. Knees in….good. Hips in…………….GOOD! Yay for having just completed Jillian Micheal’s 30 Day Shred! I fit! I got in up to my stomach and then started laughing hysterically. My neighbour’s window looks onto this window and I could hear her washing dishes. I was laughing, Jen was laughing, Rhys was unsure and Ammie didn’t understand at all. My toes landed on the back of the couch and I was in, safe and sound along with a number of mosquitoes. I ran upstairs and let everyone in, still laughing.

Silly Bria forgetting your keys and locking the doors. Thanks for putting up with my mom brain Jen! At least it wasn’t raining, right?

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5 Comments

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5 responses to “Break and Enter.

  1. Darn! I was just thinking I should procure a small child and get him to slide in through your kitchen window and steal me James’s Led Zeppelin DVDs. Looks like that won’t be a possibility anymore.

    Great story!

  2. Courtney

    I had to do that once….

  3. Mom

    Great Story Bria! Yes, Maybe to train Ammie you should hose her down everytime she poops from now on. I better she will be trained in about one day!

  4. Courtney

    Crawl through a window I mean. I was little and the boys made me do it.

  5. jule

    oh my gosh. hilarious. i wish that had happened when i’d been over. LOL! and yes, book of eli is AWESOME!!!

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